You know how sometimes the humans just cannot stop talking? Way too much yapping and not enough belly scratching? I have come up with a solution.
Paw to the head. Works like a charm.
Got mama to stop talking almost immediately. Of course it doesn't hurt that my mighty paw is almost the size of her entire face.
And if they try to move the mighty paw? Well, you can play that game too. Just dig in your toes so that they don't want to move for fear of their eyes. Trust me, they like their eyes too much to move.
Be sure to keep your paw there for awhile - so that they LEARN when it is ok to yap and when it isn't. No bark collar required!
This has been a public service message from Bogart Handsome Devil. You may now recline and resume your belly scratching.