Friday, April 18, 2014

I Feel Good... YEAH

ATTENTION RITTENHOUSE SQUARE PARK VISITORS (and everyone else within a 2-block radius): I'm feeling GOOD!

Not letting a little thing like major surgery get me down, I'm having more "up" days than "down" ones, and damnit, a boy needs his walkies. Hey, Rittenhouse, HAVE YA MISSED ME?

(I missed you)


Thursday, April 03, 2014


Shout it from the rooftops, yodel from the mountains, BOGART DOES NOT HAVE CANCER!!!



Sunday, March 30, 2014

Gotta Go, Gotta Go, Gotta Go Right N

Cats pee indoors.  Dogs do their business outside.  Mama was being nice and thought that she would get some peepee pads for me so that I didn't have to go down the stairs and outside to pee.  To which I say, AW HELL NO

A gentleman always pees outside.  Like a racehorse when necessary (like today - I am a badass but I'm not stupid).  End of story.


Friday, March 28, 2014

Surgery, Damnit

 On Thursday, something felt wrong.  Very, very wrong.  I had gone for my first "senior visit" at my local vet last Saturday where they found a large mass in my abdomen.  That wasn't fun, but we had scheduled an ultrasound and biopsy thinking that surgery was a very real possibility.

Well yes, yes it was.

Just a lot sooner than expected when my belly decided early on Thursday morning to start trouble.  So mama packed me off to Penn Veterinary Hospital's emergency clinic.  I've been here before when I had that super-hard poop, and they were nice to me then (except for those fingers up my butt, I won't ever forgive you guys for that) so I kissed mama and went off to get my treatment.

Surgery is always scary.  Emergency surgery requires that you are in the most skilled hands, and we have the utmost confidence in the doctors and nurses at Penn.  Mama spent the day crying and worrying about me, I spent the day looped out of my mind on painkillers and anaesthesia.  At the end of the day I had a tremendous tumor removed along with my spleen and I was ready to sleep.

When I woke up the next day, I wanted out.  Not that I wasn't appreciative, but I wanted to be home.  The fine folks at Penn had made only one mistake - trying to feed me something called "dog food".  If it comes out of a can, it doesn't go into this man, cause I only eat mama's home cooking.  So the doctor called mama and told them about my plight and she rushed over with some chicken soup and treats.  I was just so glad to see her I didn't eat much, but licked a little broth to let her know that I meant business about getting the hell outa Dodge.

It worked.  On Saturday she came with my pal Astro's mama, Deb to spring me from the joint.  Oh how happy I was to see her, even happier once I realized that we were heading home!!  There is nothing in the world like your own bed, nothing.  Even with my skimpy new hairdo I managed to move the pillows around to my liking and head off to dreamland.



Monday, February 10, 2014

Man of Adventure

Nothing can stop me when there are pine cones around. NOTHING.


Um, thanks.


Look.  I let you clean my toes.  I wore the potentially-humiliating Flashdance-style sweatshirt.  I'm wearing the damn booties.  GIVE ME MY CONE

I do love this snow.  Even though there has been way too much of it this year.  Yes, it's cold.  Yes, it's inconvenient.  Yes, it means I have to wear the dreaded booties.  But it's quite lovely, especially early in the morning once the sun has come up but most of Philadelphia is still asleep.  Oh, and thanks for the cone!


Friday, January 10, 2014

Go Real Slow

The Big City. The Concrete Jungle. Philadelphia is a lot of things. And one of them is that we have a really crumbling infrastructure, especially our roads. Seriously. Drive around Philly for any length of time, and you will be left with a marbled undercarriage, stubbly tires, and a reason to visit the chiropractor.

But we are also an ingenious people, folks who care about each others safety. So we come up with things like this on a regular basis:

That's right, when our overlords cannot get out with the repair trucks, we do stuff like this.

And it's actually kind of cool - a small reminder of our humanity.

As a dog, I enjoy a good car ride. Especially with my head hanging out of the window in triumph. Breathing in all of that kind-of-nasty city air. Not so easy to do when you're bouncing around like you're in a boat.

So I can appreciate the work that went into this. Someone got themselves some cardboard and a fine marker and decided to DO SOMETHING.

I'm sure that watching scores of people go way too fast down the street (like normal) as well as swearing at the top of their lungs when they crossed this street ravine (also normal) was just too much for one good samaritan.

Today that person made things a tiny bit better here on the mean streets of Philadelphia. I did my part and barked at the sign (which I'm sure did something to help). AND WHAT DID YOU DO?

So you to, Good Samaritan, I say, NICE WORK. We need more of your kind here in Philly, and elsewhere.


Friday, December 20, 2013

A Dale Near a Manger

So today I was doing my normal morning walkie through Old City, when I SMELLED SOMETHING. Mama wasn't sure why I decided to go in a new direction, and quite honestly, neither was I. But I knew that I had to get to the bottom of that smell. So we wandered further up Race Street, and suddenly, THERE IT WAS:

A live nativity scene with sheep, goats, and a donkey.

Well, there is something you don't see every day. Or smell every day. I thought they smelled quite wonderful, in fact.

Please Do Not Feed the Animals - I have no idea what this means.  Those little buggers seem hungry to me, they're eating the hay (I'd have to be pretty hungry to eat hay).

The donkey was hilarious.  Most of the time he sat in the back, behind the cutouts of the (kind of freaky looking) Mary and Joseph.  It was as if he decided that it's just too damn cold outside and he wasn't going to put on any dog-and-pony show (well why should he, he's a DONKEY) for anyone.  I appreciated his attitude.

This little furry guy was my favorite.  Not only did he smell the best, but he was affectionate and well, just so damn cute.

And then it happened - the ladies came outside with their buckets of goodness, and much excitement came over the herd.

The goats are the smartest - they seem to have this whole "live nativity scene" thing figured out.  Be shameless, bleat like crazy, and you will get fed first.  A-OK in my book.

Everyone else was a little slower on the uptake, busy with their hay eating, even though the ladies had much more delicious treats.  Come on guys, THEY HAVE SNACKS

And then, as if by magic, they all headed over to the snack bowl.  Even the lazy donkey.

The ladies did indeed have the good stuff, and everyone was apparently good this year so they were going to get goodies.




Saturday, December 14, 2013

Workin' For a Livin'

Tonight mama and I had to go to work. She had to drop something off at her office, and well, I had to help.

Once I arrived, I got right to work.

Mama worked above desk, I worked below.

Within mere minutes, I had found what I was looking for.  Fully in the interest of helping mama, I found a delicious tennis ball that she keeps under her desk.

Oh mama, I FOUND IT.  We can head to the park now.

Assistant Bogart - at your service!


Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Run Wild and Free, Bella

There is a new Airedale-shaped star in the sky. Beautiful Bella has passed away. While I am sad whenever any Airedale leaves us, this one is particularly poignant. Bella is MY MOM. 

Pretty girl, you will be so missed by your family, and even though we have not seen each other since I was a baby, I hope that you know I love you and will make you proud. Rest in peace under your favorite tree sweet mama. 



Your devoted fuzzy son, Bogart

Saturday, August 17, 2013

The Sorta-Culturalist

Today I got lessons from the one-and-only master of the backyard garden, Grandpa!

Nobody, and I mean nobody, grows vegetables and herbs as well as he does. Oh I know that this garden may not look fancy, but what comes out of it is amazing, and I just had to see for myself exactly how it's done. Here I am examining the squash for ripeness (and to smell it to see if it was worth peeing on - it wasn't).

This is IT. Tomatoes, squash, beans, kale, eggplants, cucumbers. Holy mackarel.

I was curious and wanted to get an up-close and personal view of these fine veggies. Luckily Grandpa trusts me enough to let me walk through the garden.

Here Grandpa is explaining his theories about compost. Who knew that it was so amazing? Mama, can we have compost at home? Hm... on second thought that may be difficult in our little apartment. I'm not willing to give up any of my personal square footage and I'm pretty sure the kitties won't either. Next!


Gotta get in there to check out those pots and how they work. I just may learn something today.

See this? Grandpa is apparently good at many things, even more than growing tomatoes. He made this play house. See the roof? Yep, that's a truck camper top. Clever, eh?

Thanks Grandpa for an amazing day. Thanks for trusting me in your house not to break anything (which I didn't). Thanks for the air mattress for me and Mama to sleep on. Thanks for letting me rest on your porch and only dig up a little of your flowers. And many thanks for the smoked pork, which I inhaled as soon as I got home. YOU THE BESTEST